But that doesn’t mean that they can’t help in lots of ways.  They can be a great source of support, allowing you to forget about your situation for a while.  They may also be good to bounce ideas off, or even to gain new ideas.  Friends also have other friends and work colleagues – so maybe it’s time to utilise these connections for that hated buzzword “networking”.

The quickest and easiest way of doing this is to make sure you are connected online via the major social networking sites.  Top of the list is probably Facebook purely because of its huge reach – it may not have a business/professional focus but it can quickly garner you a lot of contacts.

LinkedIn is a networking site that is much more focused towards the business and professional life and is perfect to gather both your friends off Facebook but also many employment agencies have representatives on the site.  You can also find a discussion group on LinkedIn that is relevant to your type of job where you may be able to gain more contacts.

Other social networking sites are about but the above two are probably the best to start with.

1. Profile Information.  So log-on and complete as much profile information as possible on both sites, it is a pain to have to do it but it makes a much better impression to those who look at your profile.
2. Find Groups. This is particularly relevant to LinkedIn as many industry groups have members who are agencies specialising in that area.  So join the groups, have a read through what they discuss and get involved if you think it is relevant – let your expertise impress people!
3. Always Respond. If you get a message from someone on either site then do respond, e-mail and social networking sites have made people very used to quick contacts, if you wait a few days to respond then your response may no longer be relevant.
4. Keep updated.  Let people know what you are doing – but keep it relevant to the site.  Yes on Facebook you can let people know you are off to the gym, but on sites like LinkedIn then focus on the work you are doing/looking for.  And keep doing it – the more you are in people’s consciousness online, the bigger chance they will think of you if something comes along.

The last time I was at the JobCentre I was sat waiting on a very hard-wearing sofa, and joined by a mother and her pre-teenage son. At one point a security guard asked politely if the boy could take his feet off the sofa. The mother retorted back, “Are we allowed to breathe?”. What an amazing connection to make.

I have also learned that some don’t say “signing-on” anymore, but instead the wonderful “scratching-on”. Not something to repeat in polite company.

But these people are in the minority, and anyway they shouldn’t be enough to put you off using the JobCentre for what it is there for.

My advice is to get in touch with JobCentre Plus (Phone: 0800 0 55 66 88 or Text phone: 0800 0 23 48 88 if you are deaf, hard of hearing, or have speech difficulties) the day after you have been made redundant. When I lost my job I left it a few weeks as I believed there was a job for me just around the corner. I was wrong and missed out on money I was entitled to.

So make that call and go to that initial interview – it’s not as imposing as it may look.

Scratch On!

Losing your job is a lot like any other loss you may experience in terms of the emotional states you are likely to go through, but at the other end you will realise that things aren’t actually that bad.

The five classic emotional responses to loss are: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance. If you feel yourself going through any or all of these then at the very least be comforted by the fact that what you are going through is natural.

What you want to do is to get through to stage 5 as quickly as possible with the least amount of time in the other four.

Over the coming weeks we’ll have a look at each of these stages in more detail and I’d love to hear your experiences of these.

To begin with the important word after losing your job is: Stabilize. Take a few days break if you need it, doing only a few important things, and take the time to work through your emotions and feelings.

The important things to do in those few days are:
– Read through the Redundancy letter you received and make sure you action anything it says – you don’t want to miss out on any money due to inaction.
- Sign-on. Or at least inform the JobCentre you are unemployed. You don’t even have to get out of the house to do it, but instead call 0800 0556688 (details) and do it from home.
- Let friends and family know – you may need support now more than ever.
- Take a deep breath and relax – if you’ve been on the work treadmill for a long time now this is going to be more of a shock. Take it easy and try to relax for a while.

This website is for that morning after, or the Monday after if like me you were let go on a friday.  And it’s for the days after that, and after that.  SurviveRedundancy.co.uk is about how you and I cope with the position we’ve been put into.

And coping can take many forms, and I hope to be able, with your help, to cover as many of them as possible. Whether you are looking at jumping right back into employment, changing career or deciding to work for yourself, we’ll try to cover them all.

For me this journey is more about the last item and making it work. I’m at a crossroads. 33 years old, with a baby on its way, having worked in similar roles for the past decade+ and very rarely felt comfortable that they were right for me. I’ve dallied with freelancing/contracting before but this time is, and has to be, different.

And if through SurviveRedundancy.co.uk I can learn a bit more about what I can and want to do, and in turn help/inspire others who may feel the same way, then that is perfect.

It can be a lonely road, and sometimes it can be difficult to see the “wood for the trees” but it’s potentially an exciting one.  Let’s see how it goes!

Follow me on Twitter!  

For the site Twitter (lets you know when there are new articles, plus other bits and pieces) – @surviveredundan
For my personal Twitter – @peekay

My name is Paul and I’d like to give you a quick overview of what the website is all about, why it exists and how I hope it could you help – and me!

After being made redundant in November 2008 I went through a wide range of emotions, from a brief sense of freedom, to anticipation of a new role, to fear of what the future may hold and back again to the sense of freedom. And during those times I couldn’t find any place where people were gathering to talk about the same emotions that I was going through.

Yes many of my friends were going through the same thing, the company we worked for collapsed totally just before Christmas, but their responses were at different times than me and their hopes and fears were different.

So I decided that I would try and start something myself, to give myself the chance to write about what I was going through and to maybe help all the people who look like they will be in the same position in the months to come.

I hope you will be able to recognise things in what is written on the site, but also be able to join in and contribute yourself. Finding that other people agree with what I am saying will be helpful for me as well – and of course having another website url on my CV is always helpful!

Welcome aboard, I look forward to developing the website with you!

It was a fairly normal day at MFI for me, at least it was what had become normal over the past few weeks.

I’d travelled from home in Shepherds Bush across to Colindale, a one and a quarter hour bus-tube-bus journey which had become a ridiculously ingrained, no-thought-required process.

And on the last part of the journey, on the 204 bus I sat in my usual seat upstairs watching the world go by idly wishing that I could do something usual in that time if it wasn’t for the fact that I would get motion-sickness when I tried to read, and wasn’t happy writing in the presence of the kind of nosy strangers who were also on the bus – the kind of people like me!

And I really felt I needed to do something, to spend that journeying time usefully, after all everything was changing.  The weekend before had been an interesting time.  On the Saturday morning I surprised my girlfriend by getting out a ring, that she had wanted for ages but thought had been sold to someone else, and asking her to marry me.

Then Sunday morning the magic stick confirmed that she was pregnant.  What a weekend!  But there was more to come.

So there were lots of things going through my head as I travelled to work, not least of them the fact that it was becoming obvious that I had only a short time left at MFI.

I had been pressured the past week or so by my boss to finish a particular project moving the intranet into a Sharepoint site.  We had gone live earlier in the week and were just tidying up some loose ends.  But when that was all done – I had no more work, no new projects, nothing.  So I began to focusing on guessing when I was going to be made redundant – which I was sure was going to happen soon.

I had already survived about 4 other rounds of redundancy during my time at MFI so it wasn’t as if this period of uncertainty wasn’t new to me, but this time really did seem like it was most likely going to be the fifth time unlucky.  In the early days I had been influential in the e-commerce team, making highly profitable changes, but after the company was sold I was moved to working on internal projects, something which made me easier to let go of I felt.

At a local pub that lunchtime I told a mate that I thought I was going to be let go on the following Monday, based on the lack of work and the fact that my boss was away until then.

About half an hour after getting back from work the IT Director asked for me to join him for a chat.  As I walked with him out of the office to a meeting room my mind checked off all the reasons that he would want to talk to me.

As we entered the small meeting room that was already occupied by a member of HR and a load of paperwork it became obvious.

Considering I had been expecting this for a while it still hit me in a weird way.  The Director and HR person had obviously been through this a number of times and wisely went through everything in a very formal way not really needing me to interact.  I’d gone quite numb.  One minute I felt ok, the next I wasn’t so sure.

Wandering back to my desk I had taken three bits of info from the meeting.

1 – pack up and leave today
2 – don’t worry about any work that is unfinished
3 – don’t go around telling people

I grabbed a box, packed away all of my property and then went to call my girlfriend, I mean fiancee!  I booked a cab for a quarter of an hour later and decided that item 3 could and should be ignored.  I told my mates, told my colleagues and left the building.

In the cab home I contemplated what the future might hold, and decided that on this journey at least I wouldn’t beat myself up about using the time productively…